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Hobbies. One of the first things people ask about when they meet each other are their hobbies and interests; what they like to do and what they’re interested in and passionate about.
It’s common to gauge interest and find similarities and build relationships simply based around how free time is spent, and we structure our time around the things we love. It’s even recommended that everyone has a hobby or two, because having hobbies reaps so many benefits, including helping structure time, fostering new social connections, and dealing with stress.
This is especially true while the world is practicing any amount of social-distancing due to COVID-19.
Despite the benefits of having hobbies, doing the things we love often gets pushed to the sidelines when more pressing things take center stage. Often, life can get too busy so time has to be cut from having hobbies—let alone multiple. And in our modern world, we are increasingly seeing passive activities replace once-beloved hobbies.
Related: 5 Ways Your Porn Habit May Be Harming Your Mental Health
Welcome to Earth, where screens rule supreme
What passive activities could this be? What about scrolling through social media or watching Netflix?
These aren’t inherently bad things, though there is a fundamental difference between doing or creating something and watching or being entertained by something. Both have their benefits for different aspects of life, but as professionals across varying fields have noted, be it healthcare or business—hobbies should not be neglected in our personal lives.
Hobbies stem from our interests and our passions; if hobbies are the branches of a tree, passions and interests are the roots. When we take our interests and passions from our minds and put them into actions, we allow ourselves into a more full life, and as side benefits, we can become more interesting people and meet some really cool people in the process.
So, knowing what we know about the importance of hobbies, and that professionals are always recommending that we prioritize them in our lives, we should be concerned when other things pull us away from our hobbies consistently. Make sense?
Death to hobbies equals bad news
A common symptom of being in a toxic relationship is when one partner pulls the other person away from their hobbies and social circles.
Unfortunately, there’s one toxic relationship that consistently pulls people from the things they love most in life, and many, many people across the world struggle with it: pornography.
Pornography consumption is often an escalating behavior that can become addictive. Like any addiction, chemical or behavioral, the addict prioritizes their compulsive habit over the things they love most—including their relationships and their hobbies. It happens more often than people realize.
Here at Fight the New Drug, we are flooded with heartbreaking stories of where porn has led some people, from a father who neglected and abused his children all because of his addiction, to a husband who wouldn’t be intimate with his wife because she couldn’t compete with the “perfect” women he saw performing in the porn he consumed every day.
Constructive hobby vs. destructive habit
While not every person who consumes pornography will become addicted, any person can be susceptible to acquiring an addiction to pornography. Research is revealing that any habit that has the right dopamine response can evolve into an addiction, meaning in reality, everyone can be predisposed to an addiction to something that once was only a habit.
Many habits have the potential to become addictive, which doesn’t in and of themselves make them unhealthy. For instance, food can be addictive, and eating is obviously a good (and very necessary) thing to do. Less important, social media can also be addictive, but in and of itself, scrolling through Instagram isn’t a bad behavior. So is porn different?
Pornography is not only a passive activity rather than a hobby, but it can become a destructive passive activity.
Porn’s harm extends its reach far into our lives and the world. Over and over again, we are seeing a pattern of porn harming people’s sex lives, hurting their relationships, and even perpetuating violence. And, as we mentioned before, consuming pornography can lead to addiction that pulls consumers even further from the things that they love.
Interestingly enough, research has found that out of all online entertainment, porn is the most addictive.Meerkerk, G.J., Van Den Eijnden, R.J., & Garretsen, H.F. (2006). Predicting compulsive Internet use: it’s all about sex!, CyberPsychology and Behavior, 9(1), 95-103. doi:10.1089/cpb.2006.9.95; See also Korkeila, J., Kaarlas, S., Jaaskelainen, M, Vahlberg, T., Taiminen, T. (2010). Attached to the web—harmful use of the Internet and its correlates. European Psychiatry 25(4) 236-241. doi: 10.1016/j.eurpsy.2009.02.008 (Finding “adult entertainment” to be the most common reason for compulsive Internet use.)Copy So even though something’s potential to be addictive doesn’t mean it needs to be completely avoided, it can be a hint at a potentially unhealthy behavior at its core.
Sometimes, weighing out the pros and the cons can hint at whether a behavior is worth doing. And when there’s a risk for addiction, a risk of harming yourself and those you love, as well as the guarantee that you’re supporting an industry whose lifeblood is lies and abuse, we think the choice might be obvious when the facts are considered.
Don’t let a toxic relationship with pornography get in the way of the life you want to live and keep you from doing the things you want to do. For the love of living life to the fullest, stand in the fight against pornography in our world.
Need help?
For those reading this who feel they are struggling with pornography, you are not alone. Check out Fortify, a science-based recovery platform dedicated to helping you find lasting freedom from pornography. Fortify now offers a free experience for both teens and adults. Connect with others, learn about your unwanted porn habit, and track your recovery journey. There is hope—sign up today.
Fight the New Drug may receive financial support from purchases made using affiliate links.
