Can someone become isolated from the social world we live in? Obviously, the answer is yes. Just consider the current situation of self-quarantines around the world because of COVID-19.
With immediate and almost instantaneous access to technology these days, it’s actually not at all difficult to feel emotional distancing while you’re also social distancing.
Just hear what the American Psychological Association has to say about how the internet is causing emotional distance between people, even outside of the coronavirus pandemic:
“People today are more connected to one another than ever before in human history, thanks to internet-based social networking sites and text messaging. With this, they’re also more lonely and distant from one another in their unplugged lives. This is not only changing the way we interact online, but it’s straining our personal relationships as well.”
The realities of living in a digital age.
Almost anything we do in our digitally-driven world involves some form of digital technology. Even so, whether it’s intimacy you’re currently longing for, a distraction from the real world, cure for boredom, or simply desiring sexual pleasure, digital connections will never fill the void and/or emptiness many people today are trying to deal with.
We need real connection with other real people to get our human need for connection satisfied, even amidst a global pandemic. As humans, we need a sense of belonging, and most importantly, we need community.
So, what happens when these needs are not being met, especially when you’re stuck inside? We can turn to other less healthy sources instead. In an “I want it now” culture, and especially with the internet literally within reach at all times, we can find almost anything we want at any given time, no real effort required.
Want some examples?
Need to order something online? Amazon Prime is your go-to.
Want to get picked up but your friend is at work? Uber will do.
Looking for a significant other, or just a date for the night? Download Tinder or Bumble.
Wanting to feel liked and admired? Post a pic and receive Instagram likes almost immediately.
Bored, looking for something fun, or trying to escape the real world? Pornography.
With technology only an arm’s reach away and always accessible, no wonder face-to-face social connection is starting to decrease among the upcoming generation. Instant gratification and emotional isolation can definitely happen when you’re not getting the face-to-face connection you need. Social media and having access to the internet 24/7 is our generation’s “social” reality, however, studies have shown that these digital platforms are not as “social” as you’d think.
And if you’re practicing social distancing during this tumultuous time, porn won’t help fill your emotional or social needs.
So, what happens when you turn to fantasy or unrealistic sources for needed connection? Honestly, it can feel discouraging. In order to thrive where you are, everyone needs to have encouraging and real-life relationships as well as social interaction to keep going.
Is porn your go-to pick-me-up?
A consumer may be turning to porn to get their fix or escape, whatever that may be. Because of this, viewing pornography can lead a consumer into a state of isolation and depression. This is an extreme example, though.
However, instead of turning to real human beings, people are turning to exaggerated and sexualized figures on a screen. Dr. Gary Brooks, a psychologist who has worked with porn addicts for the last 30 years, specifically states:
“The more one uses pornography, the more lonely one becomes.”
Crazy, right, considering how porn is produced to give the artificial feeling of connection?
You might be asking, “What’s wrong with a little harmless fantasy?” The reality of it is, porn can lead to or fuel difficulties in real-life relationships where there are unmet and unrealistic expectations as well as harming the consumer’s sexual health along the way. According to this article, “Doctors are seeing an epidemic of young men who, because of their porn use, can’t ‘get it up’ with a real, live partner.”
Related: Porn Site Offers Free Premium Access To Cruise Ship Passengers Quarantined Because Of Coronavirus
The more someone continues to consume porn, the more it can take away from the reality of their relationships in your everyday life. Not only do they withdraw from their peers in the state of watching porn, but, their brain is also being rewired in the process. This can overall take a toll on your mental, emotional, and physical well-being, as well as affecting the people you care about.
Where are you getting your happiness from?
Here’s a thought—could someone be using pornography as a substitute for their own happiness? The answer being, yes, and while continuing to numb themself by watching porn, they’re missing out on real people, and actual opportunities to help build those relationships. Through real relationships, a healthy person is able to find joy, peace, and the happiness real life has to offer.
Even if you’re stuck inside temporarily as we all wait out this virus.
Time is precious, and unfortunately, you won’t get it back even if you wish you could. Looking at porn can be hurtful to those around you, and not to mention, your own personal journey, quarantined or not.
Are you choosing to give your time to porn, or are you choosing to connect? There’s hope, and in the end, the choice you make of where to spend your emotional energy and time will only help those around you, including yourself.
