Header photo retrieved from The Sun. This article was originally shared in March 2019, but it is no less relevant in 2020.
Usually, when parents discover how violent so much of mainstream porn is today, they want to do anything possible to make sure their kids stay as far away from it as possible.
In the case of these five moms in the United Kingdom, they decided to direct a porn film they would want their kids to watch as part of a new show, “Mums Make Porn.” Each of them has teenage kids, and each of them found out on their own how today’s mainstream porn is essentially glorified and fetishized torture, available for free access on some of the most popular sites in the world.
Sarah, 40, from North Wales was left in tears after watching rape porn. According to Mirror, she said, “If that was the first time I’d seen anything about sex, I’d be petrified. I just thought all of a sudden that I was going to throw up… We need to show kids that there’s something else than this horrible s— we see on the internet.”
Related: How Porn Objectifies Men And Harms Male Consumers
She continued, “If my son treated a woman like that I would kick his arse to kingdom come… Porn doesn’t represent normal women, the actors and actresses they use mislead kids. They need to realize it’s not normal.”
Another mom in the group, Sarah Louise, from Manchester, said she actually became sick after watching some graphic content, while another mom was so upset and disgusted she quit the program.
For the purposes of the show, the moms worked with industry experts and were given all the tools they needed to make the movie. They were left completely in control—from writing and casting, to directing and editing their fully “mom-approved” pornographic film.
Their mission was to create a film that’s not only pornographic, but also promotes healthy attitudes toward sex and relationships for the next generation. The porn film will be aired on in the final of the three-part show as they hold a viewing party for their family, friends—and most importantly, their kids.
The show’s executive, Sarah Lazenby, said, “We’re proud to put parents in the director’s chair.”
The normalization of porn
We live in a world where XXX content is so normalized, the default response to being disgusted by free internet porn is to make your own approved version of it, not to avoid it altogether or teach your kids the dangers and harms of it. Interesting, right?
Even though these moms were horrified by what they saw, they chose to make something else pornographic. This causes us to wonder if anyone took the time to explain to them the growing mountain of research that illustrates porn’s negative effects—especially on kids—before they signed up to participate an entire TV show about their self-produced porn tapes. We’re guessing likely not.
After all, violence-free and exploitation-free porn is still not harm-free, according to research.
Related: Can Watching Porn Make Someone More Sexist?
Ultimately, loving parents do what they can to navigate their families safely through our porn-saturated digital world.
These moms likely believe they’re doing themselves and their kids a favor by producing porn they hypothetically approve of, but they likely only think that because they don’t know all the facts about porn’s impact on consumers, their relationships, and our world. Our intention with sharing their porn-production plans isn’t to shame them, but to highlight how important it is for the world to truly know what research is saying about the harmful effects of porn so they can make the best possible educated decision for themselves.
Even if these moms mean well with creating a few videos that are parent-approved—though still exploitative and objectifying—the fact remains that the vast majority of popular porn today contains violence, with the most popular videos not showing female pleasure and focusing on only male pleasure.
So what does the research say about how porn affects adolescents?
-Almost all kids see internet porn before age 14 | The National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children (NSPCC) recently conducted a survey in the UK of more than 1,000 children aged 11-16, and found that at least half had been exposed to online porn. Of this group, almost all (94%) have seen it by age 14.
-Porn doesn’t help kids understand consent | In the same survey, many boys revealed that they wanted to copy the behavior they had seen watching porn. More than a third (39%) of 13-14 year-olds who responded to this question—and a fifth of 11-12 of year-olds (21%)—wanted to repeat porn acts. The interesting part? These answers came despite more than 3/4 of the kids agreeing that porn didn’t help them understand consent.
-Porn makes young consumers anxious about sex | One of the most unsettling findings from the NSPCC survey was that over half of the boys (53%) believed that the porn they had seen was realistic. They believed that what they view in porn is an accurate depiction of sex and sexuality. This was in comparison to 39% of girls who believed the same. Many of the young girls surveyed said they were worried about how porn would make boys see girls and the possible impact on attitudes to sex and relationships.
–Porn fuels child on child sexual assault | There has been a 500% increase in child-on-child sexual assaults in the UK, and experts are largely attributing this rise to porn. In August 2014, a judge condemned the “corrosive” influence of pornography after a boy who visited hardcore pornographic websites abducted and raped a girl in his town that was just 10 years old.
–Porn can make young male consumers more sexist | A recent study by researchers at the University of Nebraska has brought to light more harms of pornography, especially in young men exposed to it early in life. The researcher who presented these findings said, “We found that the younger a man was when he first viewed pornography, the more likely he was to want power over women,” adding that “the older a man was when he first viewed pornography, the more likely he would want to engage in playboy behavior.”
-Porn leads to less sexual satisfaction and performance anxiety | The researcher involved in the Nebraska study also said, “Those who were exposed to porn early often did not enjoy sex in real life… These men often have a lot of performance anxiety with women in real life. Sexual experiences don’t go as planned or the way they do in pornography.”
-Porn consumption can result in low sex drive in teens | Many frequent porn consumers reach a point where they have an easier time getting aroused by internet porn than by having actual sex with a real partner. One recent study concluded that porn use was likely the reason for low sexual desire among a random sample of high school seniors.
Related: 10 Differences Between Healthy Sex And The Sex Porn Portrays
And these few facts only scratch the surface of the available information that shows how porn—no matter if it’s violent, or mom-approved or neither—negatively impacts consumers, young or not.
