Are you looking for some kind of confirmation that you should try to stop watching porn?
Consider this your porn kills love billboard, by Fight the New Drug.
“Porn kills love?” Seriously?
Have you ever heard the phrase “porn kills love?” It’s an awareness-raising metaphor that points to the science and research that show how porn can harm individuals, hurt relationships, and negatively impact society.
For example, many research studies have illustrated how people who watch porn tend to have relational difficulties. More specifically, studies have demonstrated how porn can contribute to unhealthy partnership characteristics like lower relationship quality and an increased likelihood of infidelity.Wright, P. J., Tokunaga, R. S., Kraus, A., & Klann, E. (2017). Pornography consumption and satisfaction: A meta-analysis. Human Communication Research, 43(3), 315-343. doi:https://doi.org/10.1111/hcre.12108Copy Perry S. L. (2020). Pornography and Relationship Quality: Establishing the Dominant Pattern by Examining Pornography Use and 31 Measures of Relationship Quality in 30 National Surveys. Archives of sexual behavior, 49(4), 1199–1213. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10508-019-01616-7Copy Perry, S. (2017). Does Viewing Pornography Reduce Marital Quality Over Time? Evidence From Longitudinal Data. Archives Of Sexual Behavior, 46(2), 549-559. Doi: 10.1007/S10508-016-0770-YCopy
Ultimately, this is not a shame-centric discussion about how “porn consumers kill love” or even a conversation about morality, seeing as Fight the New Drug is a non-religious and non-legislative organization. This is simply an opportunity to make an individual, personal, educated decision about porn for yourself given the facts that show how it can contribute negatively to people’s lives and our world.
Here’s more research-backed information about porn’s harms and why we say that porn can kills love.
How can porn harm people who watch it?
Peer-reviewed studies have linked watching porn to poorer self-esteem and lower overall mental health, which isn’t great news for viewers.Koletić G. (2017). Longitudinal associations between the use of sexually explicit material and adolescents' attitudes and behaviors: A narrative review of studies. Journal of adolescence, 57, 119–133. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.adolescence.2017.04.006Copy
Not only that, peer-reviewed studies have also found a connection between watching porn and struggling with anxiety,Wordecha, M., Wilk, M., Kowalewska, E., Skorko, M., Łapiński, A., & Gola, M. (2018). 'Pornographic binges' as a key characteristic of males seeking treatment for compulsive sexual behaviors: Qualitative and quantitative 10-week-long diary assessment. Journal of behavioral addictions, 7(2), 433–444. https://doi.org/10.1556/2006.7.2018.33Copy depression,Harper, C., & Hodgins, D. C. (2016). Examining Correlates of Problematic Internet Pornography Use Among University Students. Journal of behavioral addictions, 5(2), 179–191. https://doi.org/10.1556/2006.5.2016.022Copy diminished life satisfaction,Willoughby, B. J., Young-Petersen, B., & Leonhardt, N. D. (2018). Exploring trajectories of pornography use through adolescence and emerging adulthood.55(3), 297-309. doi:10.1080/00224499.2017.1368977Copy and feeling lonely.Butler, M. H., Pereyra, S. A., Draper, T. W., Leonhardt, N. D., & Skinner, K. B. (2018). Pornography Use and Loneliness: A Bidirectional Recursive Model and Pilot Investigation. Journal of sex & marital therapy, 44(2), 127–137. https://doi.org/10.1080/0092623X.2017.1321601Copy
When people watch porn to cope with or escape from uncomfortable emotions, these studies found that links to these mental health issues were stronger. Also, these issues persisted when someone increased their porn viewing and became compulsive with it.Levin, M. E., Lillis, J., & Hayes, S. C. (2012). When is online pornography viewing problematic among college males? Examining the moderating role of experiential avoidance.19(3), 168-180. doi:10.1080/10720162.2012.657150Copy
In other words, when you stop watching porn, this can disrupt these mental health issues and unhealthy cycles escapism.
How can porn hurt relationships?
The average porn consumer might believe that a positive side-effect of watching porn is a better understanding of how to have great sex and more satisfaction in romantic relationships, but this isn’t what dozens of studies reflect.
Despite the fact that 1 in 4 young adults report their belief that watching porn is the “most helpful” way to learn how to have sex,Rothman, E. F., Beckmeyer, J. J., Herbenick, D., Fu, T. C., Dodge, B., & Fortenberry, J. D. (2021). The Prevalence of Using Pornography for Information About How to Have Sex: Findings from a Nationally Representative Survey of U.S. Adolescents and Young Adults. Archives of sexual behavior, 50(2), 629–646. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10508-020-01877-7Copy research suggests that pornography can make young people more sexually illiterate—in other words, it’s actively spreading harmful misinformation about sex.Wright, P. J., Tokunaga, R. S., Herbenick, D., & Paul, B. (2021). Pornography vs. sexual science: The role of pornography use and dependency in U.S. teenagers’ sexual illiteracy., 1-22. doi:10.1080/03637751.2021.1987486Copy
This misinformation can disrupt harmonious and healthy relationships, however—another study illustrated how young people who watch porn reported trying to imitate what they saw in their real relationships, pressuring or trying to persuade their partners to act out what they’d seen.Rothman, E. F., Kaczmarsky, C., Burke, N., Jansen, E., & Baughman, A. (2015). 'Without Porn … I Wouldn't Know Half the Things I Know Now: A Qualitative Study of Pornography Use Among a Sample of Urban, Low-Income, Black and Hispanic Youth. Journal of sex research, 52(7), 736–746. https://doi.org/10.1080/00224499.2014.960908Copy Coercion and pressure are never be part of healthy relationships.
And despite the positive impacts porn viewers may expect in their relationships, research has routinely illustrated how a compulsive porn habit is linked to sexual dysfunction for men and women,Bőthe, B., Tóth-Király, I., Griffiths, M. D., Potenza, M. N., Orosz, G., & Demetrovics, Z. (2021). Are sexual functioning problems associated with frequent pornography use and/or problematic pornography use? results from a large community survey including males and females. Addictive Behaviors, 112, 106603. doi:https://doi.org/10.1016/j.addbeh.2020.106603Copy as well as diminished sexual satisfaction,Szymanski, D. M., & Stewart-Richardson, D. N. (2014). Psychological, Relational, and Sexual Correlates of Pornography Use on Young Adult Heterosexual Men in Romantic Relationships. The Journal of Men’s Studies, 22(1), 64–82. https://doi.org/10.3149/jms.2201.64Copy and issues with arousal and sexual performance.Sun, C., Bridges, A., Johnson, J. A., & Ezzell, M. B. (2016). Pornography and the male sexual script: An analysis of consumption and sexual relations. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 45(4), 983-994. doi:10.1007/s10508-014-0391-2Copy
World-renowned relationship experts Drs. John and Julie Gottman have even written about the impact of porn on romantic relationships. Here’s what they said in an open letter:
“Intimacy for couples is a source of connection and communication between two people. But when one person becomes accustomed to masturbating to porn, they are actually turning away from intimate interaction. [Additionally], when watching pornography the user is in total control of the sexual experience, in contrast to normal sex in which people are sharing control with the partner… In summary, we are led to unconditionally conclude that for many reasons, pornography poses a serious threat to couple intimacy and relationship harmony.”Gottman, J., & Gottman, J. (April 5, 2016). An open letter on porn. Retrieved from https://www.gottman.com/blog/an-open-letter-on-porn/Copy
On the flip-side, one study illustrated how, on every measure, people who never watch porn say they have higher-quality relationships than those who watch by themselves.Maddox, A. M., Rhoades, G. K., & Markman, H. J. (2011). Viewing Sexually-Explicit Materials Alone Or Together: Associations With Relationship Quality. Archives Of Sexual Behavior, 40(2), 441-448. Doi:10.1007/S10508-009-9585-4Copy
How does porn negatively impact our society?
But the negative impacts of porn aren’t limited to those who watch it and their relationships—research and trafficking survivor accounts have also shown how pornography actively harms our society by perpetuating and fueling sexual exploitation.
There are a number of ways porn is symbiotically linked to sex trafficking. For example, sex trafficking happens much more often than many people realize in the production process of mainstream porn, and videos of that exploitation end up on popular, free sites.
Sex trafficking shares a variety of symbiotic connections to pornography. Even in the production of mainstream porn, sex trafficking can still occur—and it happens more often than most people think.Cole, S., & Maiberg, E. (2020). Pornhub doesn't care. Vice. Retrieved from https://www.vice.com/en/article/9393zp/how-pornhub-moderation-works-girls-do-pornCopy BBC News. (2020). GirlsDoPorn: Young women win legal battle over video con. BBC News. Retrieved from https://www.bbc.com/news/technology-50982051Copy
In the United States, the federal definition of trafficking is a situation in which “a commercial sex act is induced by force, fraud, or coercion, or in which the person induced to perform such act has not attained 18 years of age.”Trafficking Victims Protection Act (TVPA) of 2000, Pub. L. No. 106–386, Section 102(a), 114 Stat. 1464. https://www.govinfo.gov/content/pkg/BILLS-106hr3244enr/pdf/BILLS-106hr3244enr.pdfCopy The unfortunate fact is that coercion, manipulation, and force are all commonly used in the production of mainstream porn—tactics that fit the legal definition of sex trafficking regardless of if producers intend to traffic or performers realize they’ve been trafficked.
How can someone know that they’re viewing porn videos that are completely exploitation-free, and devoid of any trickery, coercion, or force? The troubling issue is that there isn’t a fully reliable way to guarantee any piece of content is truly consensual.
Consider that, after they leave the industry, award-winning performers have shared that they experienced abuse, coercion, and exploitation on the sets of supposedly reputable porn companies. Not only that, consider the countless personal stories that survivors of sex trafficking and nonconsensual image-sharing have shared about how their abuse was not only recorded, but shared on free, mainstream porn sites where it received millions of views.
Reports show that virtually all major porn sites have been unable to keep nonconsensual content, child sexual abuse material (commonly called “child porn”), and videos of abuse off of their platforms completely.Kristof, N. (2021). Why do we let corporations profit from rape videos? New York Times. Retrieved from https://www.nytimes.com/2021/04/16/opinion/sunday/companies-online-rape-videos.htmlCopy Burgess, M. (2020). Deepfake porn is now mainstream. and major sites are cashing in. Retrieved from https://www.wired.co.uk/article/deepfake-porn-websites-videos-lawCopy Kristof, N. (2020). The children of Pornhub. New York Times. Retrieved from https://www.nytimes.com/2020/12/04/opinion/sunday/pornhub-rape-trafficking.htmlCopy Meineck, S., & Alfering, Y. (2020). We went undercover in xHamster's unpaid content moderation team. Retrieved from https://www.vice.com/en/article/akdzdp/inside-xhamsters-unpaid-content-moderation-teamCopy Titheradge, N., & Croxford, R. (2021). The children selling explicit videos on OnlyFans. BBC News Retrieved from https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-57255983Copy
The porn industry has an extensive history of profiting from nonconsensual content and abuse, even ignoring victims’ pleas to remove abusive content.Kristof, N. (2021). Why do we let corporations profit from rape videos? New York Times. Retrieved from https://www.nytimes.com/2021/04/16/opinion/sunday/companies-online-rape-videos.htmlCopy Kristof, N. (2020). The children of Pornhub. New York Times. Retrieved from https://www.nytimes.com/2020/12/04/opinion/sunday/pornhub-rape-trafficking.htmlCopy This is just one more way that porn can kill love.
Your own Fight the New Drug porn kills love billboard
All in all, you can use this article as a billboard advertisement for legitimate reasons to try giving up porn. Decades of quality research studies from respected academic establishments have shown how pornography can harm our society and diminish the quality of consumers’ lives and their relationships.
Porn kills love, and we invite you to consider these facts before consuming.
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