Blog

I’m Quitting Porn for Good Because I See People As More than Parts

By July 2, 2018 No Comments

Many people contact Fight the New Drug to share their personal stories about how porn has affected their life or the life of a loved one. We consider these personal accounts very valuable because, while the science and research is powerful within its own right, personal accounts from real people seem to really hit home about the damage that pornography does to real lives.

We recently received this true story from a Fighter whose experience shows the powerful effect that porn can have on the consumer’s mindset. Porn changes how the consumer sees their partner and the women/men around them. Some stories, like this one, show how porn isn't harmless entertainment and that when we view performers as people instead of objects, it changes how porn is perceived.

FTND,

I hope you all know that you are changing lives. I would like to tell you my story and an interesting thing that happened last night.

A few years back, I was in a relationship with the girl I thought I was going to marry, and we were sexually active. When she left me, I felt a void in my life and unfortunately, I turned to porn.

It didn’t take me long to realize I didn’t actually enjoy porn, I just watched it so I wouldn’t feel so lonely. I was sure, even back then before I had heard of Fight the New Drug, that real love was what I really wanted. But porn was still a daily thing for me. I kept telling myself, “1 more time and that’s it.” Then, without fail, I was back at it the next day.

I tried numerous times to stop watching porn with varying degrees of success. I would tally the number of consecutive days I went without porn for accountability to myself. At one point, I was able to go a couple months without using it before inevitably slipping up. Then, about a year ago, I was having real problems again. So I was researching online about negative effects of porn to try to scare myself away from it and that’s when I found your website and Facebook page.

Related: Porn Objectifies Women, But Does It Do The Same To Men? 

I started following FTND, and I noticed that, even though I still had troubles once in a while, I was improving. Not just my porn habits, but the way I looked at girls totally changed. One girl I had known for a while that I was never really attracted to, I suddenly really liked. I saw her for who she was instead of just what was on the outside. (It didn’t work out with her, but at least there was progress.)

The last few weeks, out of pure boredom, though, I started having more problems. But something changed. Last night, something interesting happened. It had been a few nights since my last slip-up and I found myself, as I had many times before, fighting myself and my goals of being porn-free. It was so hard to fight, and I found myself watching porn again. But something happened that has never happened before.

The first video I pulled up, there were a couple of girls from the same small town a friend of mine is from. When they said where they were from, I shallowly thought, “Yep, they fit the stereotype of every girl I know from there.” Except they did some things that I’d never imagined anyone doing from that small town. I was infuriated that they’d do those things on camera for money. So I backed out and exited the video.

Related: Just Because Porn Performers Do Porn, Doesn’t Mean They Like It Or Asked For It

The next video I came across was a revenge porn video of a girl who didn’t know she was being filmed. That infuriated me even more. This girl had no idea she was being filmed and exposed online to the whole world. What kind of person would do that to her? I couldn’t take anymore, so I turned it off and went to sleep.

This group has helped me to see women as people, instead of objects. To see them as beautiful minds, not just as body parts. After last night, I’m hoping I will never feel the desire to watch again. I’m choosing that, and I’m fighting for that.

THANK YOU FOR THE HELP YOU’VE BEEN!

T.

Why this matters

We applaud this Fighter for deciding to break away from his porn habit and for seeing performers as people, instead of sexual objects. Porn promotes the idea that people are just a collection of body parts to be used and discarded. When a consumer sees pornographic images, research shows that they detach the performers on screen from their humanity, and see them as nothing more than objects. How is that healthy?

To give you an idea of how damaging these images are, a study by Princeton psychologists showed a group of men pictures of male and females, some barely clothed and some not. During the study, the psychologists monitored their medial prefrontal cortex (mPFC), which is involved in recognizing human faces and distinguishing one person from another. For the most part, the mPFC was activated with each picture. However, when the men viewed the pictures of sexually dressed women, it was not activated. Basically, the automatic reaction in the men’s brains suggests that they didn’t perceive the women as fully human. Just as a body.

What if we lived in a world where the status quo was respect and love, instead of objectification and sexualization? What if we lived in a world where consumers saw the performers in porn as real people with hopes, dreams, and a story?

In today’s society, porn is considered completely normal and natural, but research is constantly showing the negative effects of porn. The world may consider porn as harmless entertainment, but the results shown by science and research would disagree. Sexual exploitation and objectification aren’t healthy for consumers and society—relationships built on love and respect are what ultimately matter, and that’s what we’re fighting for.

Get Involved

Porn warps viewers’ perspective about sex and leads them to believe that others are just body parts. SHARE this article and take a stand against the objectification that porn promotes.

Spark Conversations

This movement is all about changing the conversation about pornography. When you rep a tee, you can spark meaningful conversation on porn’s harms and inspire lasting change in individuals’ lives, and our world. Are you in? Check out all our styles in our online store, or click below to shop:

Send this to a friend

Like all websites, we use cookies. By continuing on this site, you agree to our use of cookies. More

The cookie settings on this website are set to "allow cookies" to give you the best browsing experience possible. If you continue to use this website without changing your cookie settings or you click "Accept" below then you are consenting to this.

Close