Starting The Conversation
Remember, the way you choose to start the conversation will set the tone. We know you’re ready, but sometimes it helps to have some ideas of what to say to break the ice. Depending on who you’re talking with, and the specific conversation you’ll have, if it feels appropriate you could try infusing humor. If that doesn’t feel appropriate, sometimes focusing on research, and communicating your experiences sincerely can be the best approach. Check out some of these options below, and consider personalizing them for your conversation.
Conversation Starters & Ice Breakers
Hey, could we talk? I love you, and I really want to tell you about something that’s been going on with me.
Hey, did you know porn fuels sex trafficking?
Hey. So… I struggle with porn. Can we talk about it?
I recognize that the past is the past, and I want you to know that I’m not judging you. That being said, it’s important to me to talk about my perspective on porn and I’d like to know where you currently stand on the issue.
I read an interesting article today…well I read the caption and scrolled through the comments… but it was about the harms of porn and it made me think twice about it. What do you think about porn?
Have you ever watched porn? If so, when did you start viewing it?
I want you to feel safe to open up to me when we discuss this, so if you’re not ready to talk about this now, that is totally fine. I’d love to discuss it later, because this issue is very important to me.
So, I’ve been learning more about the harmful effects of pornography and I really want to quit.
Hey, I just wanted to say thank you so much for always listening to me and being understanding…and now I want to open up to you about porn.
Can I ask you about something that’s personal and might be kind of difficult to talk about?
I’d like to share something with you. This is not easy for me to open up about, so I really need your love and support as I open up about this.
So, when was the last time you had a casual conversation about porn? Never? Me neither. Can we talk about it?
I realize this is kind of out of left field… but could we talk about porn?
I totally understand if you’re not completely ready to talk about this now, and that’s okay… but I’d like to talk about porn if sometime if that’s okay with you? I’d like to explain to you why this issue is important to me.
So, I realize this is something we’ve never talked about before… but could we talk about porn?
Can we have a potentially awkward conversation? Don’t worry, I will love you no matter what comes out during this discussion. The most important thing to me is that you’re honest with me.
I’ve actually done a lot of research about how porn impacts individuals, relationships, and society… and I can’t believe that it’s something that nobody talks about.
It might be intimidating, but you’re ready to do this! Know that you can always revisit FTND if you’re looking for more information or resources. Remember you’re not alone! We’re rooting for you and fighting alongside you as you change the conversation about porn.
